Sweet Welfare Relief

     Ya know, I have talked about this before.  I really hate talking about it because I can't personally know what it is like to be unemployed.  But when the lady in front of me is paying with her food stamps, no wait, paying with her food stamp credit card and her 2 sons are wearing the new Air Jordan's while one is listening to his ipod touch and surfing the net while the other is playing his PSP, I get a little pissed.  A little pissed that my entire grocery bill could have been paid for plus extra money for the good beer, all been paid for by one of those kid's pair of sneakers.  Hell, between 2 pairs of those sneakers, the ipod and PSP, that is roughly $600!!! That is 2 car payments, 3 months worth of student loan payments, 75% of my monthly mortgage bill or 20 weeks worth of gas for my car to get to work!!!  And she was paying with her food stamps while I used my own money.  Yet her kids have better toys and clothes than I do.  WTF!!!  That is the kind of shit that pisses me off to where I start to agree with TCY about welfare and food stamps.  I understand the need for these services but I think the system is broken.  Not just broke and needs a little repair, I mean FUBAR.  FUCKED UP BEYOND ALL REPAIR.  The system needs a major overhaul because people who really need it have trouble getting it and the people who don't need it are abusing it.  How and why is it possible for an illegal family to get on welfare and food stamps? If they are in our country illegally, why are we paying for them?  The family that can afford super brand name clothes, gadgets and games can't afford food?  I think their priorities are a little fucked if you ask me.  TCY agrees partly, but of course he says it a little different.

It always amazes me how the people we look at as the poor in our society always seem to have enough money to be in all the same places as your average tax paying citizen. If this were a fair world in which we live this would not be possible. If you’re poor enough to need my money, than you should be poor enough to stay the hell out of my way when I go somewhere.

Yesterday I went to the Red Box just to return a video.  I arrived to find a "family" (1 dude, a fat chick and an old lady) this would be the average trailer park,  welfare looking, food stamp using, child producing, white trash type. They stood there gazing with eager anticipation looking for the 3rd movie that they would view that evening. That's 6 hrs of mind numbing entertainment that cost 3 dollars IF you return the next day.  However, it took so long to pick that last movie, they kept looking over and over again into the viewer as though another movie title would magically appear.  Finally I spoke out and said, "It will take less time to watch the damn movie than you toothless, fat ass’s are taking to pick one.

I'm not sure if it was the fat asses or the toothless part but the old lady seemed upset that I would dare to interrupt their family get together. She turned and asked me what I said.  I told her I was directing my comment to the man of the group but that I would repeat my statement once more for her edification.  You should have seen the look I got when I said that.  Deer in the headlights my ass, this women looked at me like I was from another planet trying to communicate with her.

Getting back to my point.  If people are on any kind of taxpayer support, they should not have enough money to rent movies, buy cigarettes, buy booze, drugs, sex, anything.  If they are taking our money to pay their bills, they shouldn't have any comforts.  It's getting to the point where we cannot afford to comfort ourselves because all of our comfort money is being taken away to give to the poor, poor, pitiful poor.

If you doubt what I say, drive by a poor neighborhood. You will find satellite dishes everywhere. The kids will have ipods and cell phones.  Some of their cars are better than mine!  They have gold chains around their necks; there is always a corner where there is plenty of drinking going on. If you where to go in their houses (section 8 houses paid for by you and I), you would find flat screen TV's, blue ray players, stereo systems that can knock the pictures off the walls. This isn't poor.  Look at pictures from the 1930's, you will find torn clothes, hollowed checks from lack of food, signs looking for work. Dirt floor houses with no comforts what so ever. This is how the poor should live.

No, I'm not cold.  In fact I am just the opposite. I want the poor to do better.  I want them to have all that society has to offer.  They will never get it like this. They have no reason to go to work.  They have all they could want given to them.  There is no pride in achieving success when all that was needed was an out stretched hand. We should feed them oatmeal and bread.  Hell, it's good enough for the starving children of Africa. That's what we feed them anyway. It keeps them alive, which is all that is required. Give them shelter, tents, it good enough for prisoners in Arizona.  It keeps them alive, which is all that is required. We should clothe them, bright orange jump suits so that everyone will know that this person is being paid for by the taxpayer. Shame, yes shame like people had in the old days when they took things that they didn't work for. IF we did this, the poor would want to do better and would live the American dream just like the rest of us.

Let's shake America’s fleas and ticks off the working dogs back!

Fight Back!!!

TCY

Damn, I Want Some Good Passat!!!

 
   Just to start this off, anyone who works with me, will know exactly what the title means and should look at the picture at the very bottom!  This one's for you Grizzly!  Anyway, I received this email a few days ago.  It was funny but I was not convinced it was true or accurate.  I did some research about it, since it was a "scientific study" but found it that it is all just based on stereotypes.

What Do People Fear the Most?

 

WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST?
This is pathetic, but darn funny when you think about it for a second.
Two magazines, Country Living (95.99% white readership) and Ebony /Jet (99.99% black readership) did surveys on....
"WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST?"

The results were interesting, to say the least....

Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S
2. Child/spouse dying
3. Terminal illness
Ebony / Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail
No Kidding... And these are the people who put Obama over the top; what would you expect?
AND TO GO ALONG WITH ALL OF THIS, I'LL SHARE TWO QUOTES; ONE PITIFUL AND ONE GREAT!
"My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you'll join with me, as we change it."-- Barack Obama
''Life's tough, pilgrim, and it's even tougher if you're stupid.'' John Wayne
Read on!!!!
Professor Joseph Olson of Hamline University School of Law in St. Paul, Minnesota , points out some interesting facts concerning November's Presidential election:

• Number of States won by: Obama:19  - McCain: 29
• Square miles of land won by: Obama:580,000  - McCain: 2,427,000
• Population of counties won by: Obama:127 million  - McCain: 143 million
• Murder rate per 100,000 residents in counties won by: Obama:13.2 - McCain: 2.1

Professor Olson adds: "In aggregate, the map of the territory McCain won was mostly the land owned by the taxpaying citizens of the country.
Obama territory mostly encompassed those citizens living in low income tenements and living off various forms of government welfare..."
Olson believes the United States is now somewhere between the "complacency and apathy" phase of Professor Tyler's definition of democracy, with some forty percent of the nation's population already having reached the "governmental dependency" phase.
If Congress grants amnesty and citizenship to twenty million criminal invaders called illegals - and they vote - then we can say goodbye to the USA in fewer than five years.

Here is a link to the website that has some info on this supposed survey.   What People Fear the Most.
Now, TCY has something to say also.  

To go along with the email I above, let me add some of my fears.

1. I fear small guys with big mouths. You know the littlest bastard in the bar that comes up to the biggest baddest mother in the place and talks shit. Why do I fear this, because you can't win. If you sweep the floor with this guy, it looks as though your picking on a little dude and there is no honor to be won. If you let the little fuck get away with talking to you like a bitch, then a bitch you are.

The answer is let the little shit have the first, second and third swings (not hits) then mail him home to his loved ones.

2. I fear stupidity. It is a growing problem that the article states wonderfully. The schools are dumbing down our children. No one is allowed to be brighter than the slowest, most oxygen deprived, in-bred little retard in the class. They don't teach history correctly. They don't teach anything about the founders of this nation except they owned slaves. They do however teach them how to get a voting card. Now that's scary. Ask someone what the federalist papers are, who wrote them, what's the bill of rights? silence.......

3. I fear the effects of aging. Not aging, just the effects. I fear not being able to defend myself in a good knock down drag out with some young punk who still shits yellow. I dread the morning when my dick won't come out of hiding and I piss on my balls. I fear having a shot at some young strange and bo-bo and the twins won't be up to the task.

4. I fear finally getting to 65 yrs and retire only to find that this would be the year that Social Security finally dies.

It would be a good thing at the wrong time.

Just for you TCY.  6 Swedish Virgins.

5. Lastly, I fear getting to heaven and finding that the Muslims were right.  I could have had 40 virgins, and non- Arab virgins at that!  They were all Swedish.



Fight Back

TCY

   

    I have to say that I do not know why anyone would be excited for 40 virgins.  Seriously, just think about it.  40 women who know nothing about sex!  No technique, no clue on what feels good, what men like , or what you should watch out for.  Let's keep this sort of clean here.  40 virgins who have no experience in, uhhh how should I say it, oral pleasure.  I don't know about TCY, but teeth hurt down there!  Maybe TCY likes a cold, inexperienced,  fish laying there, but I am for equal opportunity.  I work hard and she works hard.  If you got to do all the work, it is not as fun.  Just how my brain thinks.  


Hey Outlaw, is this Gay enough for you??? The one and only...PINK PASSAT!!

    

You're just funny, it's... funny, the way you tell the story and everything.

     Just some jokes I heard from TCY and some of our other readers.  Sometimes you just need a good laugh, even if it is a sexist, mean, racist or non-politically correct joke. Enjoy!  Let's see how many titles I can get from one scene of Goodfellas to represent these jokes.

 

The Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.   

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

Floor 1 -  has wives that love sex.

Floor 2 -  has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

Tarzan

Tarzan leaves the jungle, comes to civilization, and applies for a job
.
Interviewer: "Name?"

Tarzan: "Me, Tarzan."

Interviewer: "Married?"

Tarzan: "Wife, Jane."

Interviewer: "Children?"

Tarzan: "Son, boy."

Interviewer: "Anything else to your name besides Tarzan?"

Tarzan: "Tarzan, King of the Jungle."

Interviewer: "Jane's Whole Name?"

Tarzan: "Jane's Hole named Pussy." 

Alabama Girl

A teacher asks an Alabama redneck girl to use “handsome” in a sentence. She says, “When I’m giving head and my jaw gets sore, I use my handsome.”

Essays on Love and Sex:

Females wrote :

When two mature people are passionately and deeply in love with one another to a

high degree and that they respect each other very much, then, it is spiritually

and morally acceptable to the society that they both engage themselves in the

act of physical sex with one another.

Men wrote :

I love sex

Where babies come from…

A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother,

"Is it true what Rita just told me?"

"What's that?" asks her mother.

"That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?

" said her daughter.

"Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come

up and that

she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter.

"But then, when I have a baby," responded the teenager, "won't it knock my teeth

out?"

“FUCK”

FUCK: Our most versatile word. By its stress and inflection it can

describe many emotions; no other word can be used with so many

grammatical nuances. It can be used as a moun (I don't give a fuck), as

an adjective (It's a fucking beauty), as a verb it is transitive form (the

game was fucked by the weather), and its intransitive form (he well and

truly fucked it up), in the past tense (I was fucked, in the present

tense (I am fucked) and in the future tense (I'll be fucked). Many

everyday expressions show its true versatility:

Denial....................I didn't fucking do it.

Perplexity................I know fuck-all about it.

Apathy....................Who gives a fuck anyway.

Greetings.................How the fuck are you.

Resignation...............Oh fuck it.

Derision..................He fuck's everything up.

Suspicion.................Who the fuck are you.

Panic.....................Let's get the fuck out of here.

The word has been used by some very notable people throughout history,

the more well known being.

"What the fuck was that"........................Mayor of Hiroshima

"Look at all those fucking Indians".............General Custer

"Where the fuck's all the water coming from"....Captain of the Titanic

"That's not a fucking gun"......................John Lennon

"The fucking throttle's stuck!".................Geoff Back

"Sleep, who needs fucking sleep ?"..............Geoff Back

"Reading, its only fucking 60 miles away !".....Geoff Back

"Where the fuck did that central reservation

come from ???"...........................Geoff Back

"Who's going to fucking know"...................President Nixon

"Head's are going to fucking roll"..............Anne Boleyn

"Who let that fucking woman drive"..............Space shuttle captain

"Watch him, he'll have some fucker's eye out"...King Harold

"I thought I could smell fucking petrol"........Nikki lauda

"What fucking map"..............................Mark Thatcher

"She's just a fucking secretary"................Cecil Parkinson

"Any fucker can understand that"................Einstein

"It fucking looks like her".....................Picasso

"What fucking log"..............................Richard Branson

"What the fuck do you mean I'm forever

blowing bubbles"........................Michael Jackson

"How the fuck do you work that out".............Pythagorus

"You want what on the fucking ceiling"..........Michaelangelo

"Fuck-a-duck"...................................Walt Disney

"Why ? - because its fucking there".............Edmund Hilary

"I didn't want to fucking go anyway"............Seb Coe

"Just a fucking wall"...........................Peter Elliot

"I don't suppose its fucking raining"...........Joan of Arc

"What a way to make a fucking living"...........Cynthia Payne

"Who gives a fuck what its name is".............Elizabeth II

"I haven't got a fucking clue"..................Miss Marple

"Scattered showers my fucking arse".............Noah

"Armada, what the fuck is an armada"............Sir Francis Drake

Be Strong

A prisoner escapes from his California prison where he had been kept for 15 years.

As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it.  He finds a young couple in bed. He gets the guy out of bed, ties him up on a chair,

ties up the woman to the bed and starts kissing her on the neck, then gets up,

and goes to the bathroom. While he is there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy is a prisoner, look at his clothes!  He probably spent a lot of time in prison, and has not seen a woman in years.  I saw the way he kissed your neck.  If he wants to go all the way, don't resist, don't complain, just do what he tells you, give him satisfaction.

This guy must be dangerous, if he gets angry, he will kill us.  Be strong, honey.

I love you" To which the wife responds, "He was not kissing my neck.

He was whispering in my ear.  He told me that he found you very sexy,  and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom.

Be strong, honey. I love you too...

Thought this was appropriate, especially for the "Fuck" joke above.  What would Carlin say about the world today if he were still alive?

Who wants an invasion?

When the government fears the people, there is liberty. When the people fear the government, there is tyranny - Thomas Jefferson

    I got an email from TCY the other day.  It was about hunting but not really.  This short email impressed me so much, and made me proud to be part of this country in a strange sort of way that I just had to post it. 

Intriguing numbers…and to think there are gun owners that do not hunt as well…

WORLD'S LARGEST ARMY

  

America's hunters.

This blogger adds up all the hunters in just a handful of states, and comes to a striking conclusion:

The state of Wisconsin has gone an entire deer-hunting season without someone getting killed!   That's great!  There were over 600,000 hunters.  Allow me to restate that number.  Over the last two months, the eighth largest army in the world, has more men under arms than Iran; more than France and Germany combined were deployed to the woods of a single American state to help keep the deer menace in check. 

But that pales in comparison to the 750,000 who are in the woods of Pennsylvania a few weeks ago.  Michigan's 700,000 hunters have now returned home.  Toss in a quarter million hunters in West Virginia, and it is literally the case that the hunters of those four states alone would comprise the largest army in the world.

His point?  America will forever be safe from foreign invasion with that kind of home-grown firepower.  Hunting is not just a way to fill the freezer.  It's a matter of national security.

"You cannot invade the mainland United States.  There would be a rifle behind every blade of grass."

 - Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto (Japanese Navy)

NOW YOU KNOW WHAT THE SECOND AMENDMENT IS ALL ABOUT!

        I used to be worried that China might have a power trip one day and decide to invade, but after reading this, I don't think so.  Just a few of the people I work with have enough guns to put up a good defense and they are pretty normal guys.  I know there are crazies out there with an entire arsenal.  Ever watch that movie Tremors? That couple that had the fucking arsenal in their basement.  They are really out there!!!   That quote above from Isoroku Yamamoto is so damn true. 
     On New Year's Eve, I had the opportunity to meet a few of my neighbors that I didn't know so well and found out a few interesting things about my neighbors. 

1. It seems almost everyone in my subdivision has at least 1 gun in their house, some more than 1.  So, if we ever get invaded, and they make it to my neck of the woods, I'm not worried.
2. Whiskey is the choice drink in my subdivision
3. Everyone loves Pulp Fiction!

Public Enemy #1

     
     Well, this next post could be a big one.  It is something TCY feels strong on and it is also something I feel strongly against.  The problem is we are both stubborn and will have the last word.  Anyone who knows me, knows exactly what I am about to talk about. . . SMOKING.  Everyone know how I feel about smoking.  Everyone also knows how TCY feels about smoking and having the free will to do what you want, especially when it comes to your own body.  I will let TCY start this off. . .

To Smoke or Not to Smoke, That is The Question

It seems today that the American smoker is public enemy #1. You can't smoke in restaurants; you can't smoke in the work place, hospitals, airplanes, trains or buses. Then they extended it to you can't smoke in front of a hospital, you can't smoke in any place that hasn't been deemed a "smoking area", which is always right next to the garbage dumpster. Then the bastards were still not happy.  You can't smoke in bars. What? I can't smoke in a bar? People who don't smoke, smoke in bars!

Smokers, it seems are second hand citizens, we have lost our rights. Oh I hear the non- smokers, "what about our rights not to smell your smoke?" FINE!!  What about my right not to smell Korean food, Indian food, and nasty farts caused by Mexican food. Or here's an idea.  Why don't you stop going into places where there is smoke?  That's right, it can work the other way too. If you don't like something, don't do it, don't go there, just shut the hell up and deal with it like every other generation has done.

"Second hand smoke will shorten our lives,” they say. OK, that should help with the social security problem’s we're having.

What other smells offend you princess?  What other part of society would you like to kiss your ass so that your delicate little node of yours isn't offended? Then on top of it all, they want to tax the shit out of them. I'd like to ask a question, if these utensils of calm, these little tools of tranquility are so bad for you, why aren't they illegal?  I’ll tell you why. The government won't give up on anything that is bringing in taxes. As long as there are stupid people who say "if it doesn't directly impact my wallet go ahead and tax it into submission.” What they fail to understand is one day it will be something that does effect them and who will stick up for them?  For instance, now they are going after soda, and junk food. Government wants to raise the taxes on those things because they are bad for you. What's next?  You all just keep pointing the finger at others saying,  “tax them, not me” and one day someone will be pointing their finger at you.

Fight back

TCY

I believe that each side should have a fair shot, so TCY this one if for you.

    
     Where to start.  See, the problem I have with TCY is that with some things, I completely disagree and then there are other things I agree on.  This is both.  When it comes to us seeing eye to eye about the smoking issue, it's like Shrek vs. Danny Devito.  But when it comes to taxes and government, it's like looking in the mirror. 
    So, let's start with the smoking issue.  I can't stand smoking and think that if you want to smoke, smoke in your car, your house but not in public.  If you want to smoke and destroy your body, that's fine with me as long as you don't force it onto me! That is why smoking is banned in restaurants, airplanes and hospitals.  In bars, I have to agree a little, because I know people who only smoke when drinking but they go hand in hand and that's a different subject. Back to the point.  As for having to smell it, yes, i hate the smell of smoke, i hate standing in line smelling a guy who has been smoking.  The rules were not made because they don't like the smell of smoke.  The rules were put in place because of the health issues from the smoke, not the smell.

Stupid Smokers!

     For this generation to "shut the hell up and deal with it like every other generation has done", well this is a new generation and we are different that that old generation from the 60's and 70's.  Things have changed with time!  This generation is so different from the last.  I mean, hell we can now start our cars from our smart phones 3000K miles away!   We can clone living creatures, we have more information available at our fingertips than most people had their whole lives back in the 70's.  Hell shut-in's can live an almost normal life because of the Internet, Amazon and E-bay because they never have to leave their house to get food, clothing or pay bills!!!  If I am gonna die because of someone else, I would rather get run over by a Mack truck and get it over with than die a slow painful death from lung cancer I got from breathing in second hand smoke!

    Now, let's talk about our caring and fair government, always putting it's citizens best interest first.  If the government can get their hands in something to benefit them and not the people they do it.  My question is they tax cigarettes, i got it.  Why not legalize marijuana?  Mary Jane is just a different type of plant to smoke, it's just a different type of tobacco...sort of.  You inhale it, the smoke goes into your lungs, you get Lung Cancer and you die.  End of story.  But the government wants to fight it instead of giving in and making a shit-ton of money.  If the government legalized marijuana, they could grow it themselves(Cha-Ching),they could require a license to grow and sell it(Cha-Ching) and lastly but not least...they could tax the fuck out of it(Cha-Ching)(Cha-Ching)(Cha-Ching)!!!  The U.S. Government would make enough money the first year that they could pay off the national fucking debt!!!  But that is just my opinion, and who the fuck am I? Just a tax paying citizen.  Hell, if the government really wanted to make some $$$, why not legalize prostitution? They can monitor it, keep checks on it and tax, tax, tax it!!!